If the day went on not as good as I hoped, I won’t call it “bad day”, yet I regard it as a testing day. The day, in which my patience and endurance are tested, at the end, drive a mix of feelings. Would you know what hit you today? I feel like going to pieces right now. Sorry for being too emotional because I will take things out of myself if I don’t express them out. I couldn't concentrate on what I was doing today due to what has just happened.
Today is my first day of practicum, I know I have to be mentally, physically and spiritually prepared so that my first day will start smoothly, thus, the good beginning may offer positive kind of feelings inside me to undergo the next days ahead. What made me sobbed my heart out today was that I faced a few of unexpected things.
Yesterday, I squandered a few hours of ironing all my Baju Kurung as well as tudung, and all the things needed for this week already prepared as I will not be too hurry in case I wake up late in the morning. Seventh semester change me a lot. I turned up becoming an organized person, that I am actually not, I put a thick file accompanied with long red book with an IPSAH Logo at the center of it (to jot down my lesson plan, reflection and journal), all sorts of keys, stationery, a letter regarding verification of practicum teacher produced by IPSAH to be shown to Principal, and many else. I located two huge begs next to my bed before I go off sleeping so I can just grab it when I have to make a frantic dash to the school. The problem is that I drive my car alone in the dark of dawn, learn to be daring to surmount the darkness. When I was in desperate situation whereby I need to act automatically, then it will just happen in out of expectation. My usual routine was drastically changing since I got to know that I have to be at school sharp on 7.20 a.m, of course I don’t want to be labeled as a “latecomer” though being late regarded as a normal thing, I mean not a big matter to me actually. Sorry to say that. That is my most-hated habit which I really want to get rid of. Nobody can help me to wither this bad habit away. I couldn't tell how hard is it to depends on my own self in changing something which has well-embedded inside of me. Shame on me;(
Around 6.35 a.m, I pressed my alarm key to unlock my Saga while I was approaching it. The sound sounded a kind of weird, the sound broke the silence of dawn, it happened repeatedly even when I pressed the blue button to stop the irritating sound. Still, it didn’t stop. I climbed up the car, inserted my key in the keyhole, twisted to right direction, but the engine couldn’t start. I tried again and again but the car engine still could not start. I put my eyes directly on the screen behind the steering-wheel. I was speechless to see the red dot kept blinking while the green signals' sign started ticking. I got panicked but was trying to be calm. My other friends were so busy putting their bags in the car, looked so hurried to go to their school, so I knew I couldn’t depend on their help or they will be late to attend school assemble. I remembered Fikri is free for the whole morning since he has school within evening session so he was the only hope at that time. He sent Farah and Wiwit to their school, then, he dropped me at my school a bit late. My car was left in the parking lot behind of my hostel. Nevertheless, I should Thank Allah as I was able to attend my first day of practicum.
At school, I received a timetable from Penolong kanan 1 who was the first person I met the moment I entered the main office. Jihan was already there, waiting for me to get into his office together. We had a short conversation, introduced ourselves to him in polite manner. Anyway, we were trained by our lecturer to act politely, well-disciplined for the reason of giving a good impression to school as we are representating IPSAH. Meaning that our image portrays our college's image. That was what Mr Nukman said before we embarked on our practicum.
I was instructed to teach form 2 and form 4 classes, teacher told me not to put high expectation as they are not a good class, may be difficult to handle the class. The staffroom was so packed and overcrowded; the only place has for us is the school library so we had to stay in the library for a while. Thank God, at least, I have a seat to lean against. By tomorrow, I will have to start teaching which too soon for me since I haven’t met my mentor teacher today because she was out for choral speaking and Drama. I met the teacher whose class will be taken over by me until 22nd October. We had some words, talking about the class and syllabus. A few minutes afterward, I managed to take piles of books from the shelves of the staffroom to be utilized as materials for my coming lesson.
Schools off about 2; 00 P.m. . Farah fetched me up and we explored around the industrial area just to find “A proton service shop”, which told by one of the teachers in my school after telling them the problem of my car. Two standing men greeted me with welcoming smile and asked me “ nak apaa cikgu”. They knew I am a teacher, though I didn't tell them, I got an aura of teacher, my appearance can tell, maybe- based on my attire and a name tag pinned on my pink tudung. I told them about how much does it cost to tow my car from college. They advised me not to tow the car, it’s better to find a mechanic at any workshop rather than paying almost RM60 for towing, because the problem may come from the engine that may be the reason why my car couldn't start. I drew a smile while listening to their suggestion. I gave a nod to them as a sign of " I get their points". I went back to college and dropped by a workshop to settle the problem.
I afraid of thinking about what may happen tomorrow, what would touch my nerve in the future? God, please make it easy and pleasant for me to go through this practicum.
Today is my first day of practicum, I know I have to be mentally, physically and spiritually prepared so that my first day will start smoothly, thus, the good beginning may offer positive kind of feelings inside me to undergo the next days ahead. What made me sobbed my heart out today was that I faced a few of unexpected things.
Yesterday, I squandered a few hours of ironing all my Baju Kurung as well as tudung, and all the things needed for this week already prepared as I will not be too hurry in case I wake up late in the morning. Seventh semester change me a lot. I turned up becoming an organized person, that I am actually not, I put a thick file accompanied with long red book with an IPSAH Logo at the center of it (to jot down my lesson plan, reflection and journal), all sorts of keys, stationery, a letter regarding verification of practicum teacher produced by IPSAH to be shown to Principal, and many else. I located two huge begs next to my bed before I go off sleeping so I can just grab it when I have to make a frantic dash to the school. The problem is that I drive my car alone in the dark of dawn, learn to be daring to surmount the darkness. When I was in desperate situation whereby I need to act automatically, then it will just happen in out of expectation. My usual routine was drastically changing since I got to know that I have to be at school sharp on 7.20 a.m, of course I don’t want to be labeled as a “latecomer” though being late regarded as a normal thing, I mean not a big matter to me actually. Sorry to say that. That is my most-hated habit which I really want to get rid of. Nobody can help me to wither this bad habit away. I couldn't tell how hard is it to depends on my own self in changing something which has well-embedded inside of me. Shame on me;(
Around 6.35 a.m, I pressed my alarm key to unlock my Saga while I was approaching it. The sound sounded a kind of weird, the sound broke the silence of dawn, it happened repeatedly even when I pressed the blue button to stop the irritating sound. Still, it didn’t stop. I climbed up the car, inserted my key in the keyhole, twisted to right direction, but the engine couldn’t start. I tried again and again but the car engine still could not start. I put my eyes directly on the screen behind the steering-wheel. I was speechless to see the red dot kept blinking while the green signals' sign started ticking. I got panicked but was trying to be calm. My other friends were so busy putting their bags in the car, looked so hurried to go to their school, so I knew I couldn’t depend on their help or they will be late to attend school assemble. I remembered Fikri is free for the whole morning since he has school within evening session so he was the only hope at that time. He sent Farah and Wiwit to their school, then, he dropped me at my school a bit late. My car was left in the parking lot behind of my hostel. Nevertheless, I should Thank Allah as I was able to attend my first day of practicum.
At school, I received a timetable from Penolong kanan 1 who was the first person I met the moment I entered the main office. Jihan was already there, waiting for me to get into his office together. We had a short conversation, introduced ourselves to him in polite manner. Anyway, we were trained by our lecturer to act politely, well-disciplined for the reason of giving a good impression to school as we are representating IPSAH. Meaning that our image portrays our college's image. That was what Mr Nukman said before we embarked on our practicum.
I was instructed to teach form 2 and form 4 classes, teacher told me not to put high expectation as they are not a good class, may be difficult to handle the class. The staffroom was so packed and overcrowded; the only place has for us is the school library so we had to stay in the library for a while. Thank God, at least, I have a seat to lean against. By tomorrow, I will have to start teaching which too soon for me since I haven’t met my mentor teacher today because she was out for choral speaking and Drama. I met the teacher whose class will be taken over by me until 22nd October. We had some words, talking about the class and syllabus. A few minutes afterward, I managed to take piles of books from the shelves of the staffroom to be utilized as materials for my coming lesson.
Schools off about 2; 00 P.m. . Farah fetched me up and we explored around the industrial area just to find “A proton service shop”, which told by one of the teachers in my school after telling them the problem of my car. Two standing men greeted me with welcoming smile and asked me “ nak apaa cikgu”. They knew I am a teacher, though I didn't tell them, I got an aura of teacher, my appearance can tell, maybe- based on my attire and a name tag pinned on my pink tudung. I told them about how much does it cost to tow my car from college. They advised me not to tow the car, it’s better to find a mechanic at any workshop rather than paying almost RM60 for towing, because the problem may come from the engine that may be the reason why my car couldn't start. I drew a smile while listening to their suggestion. I gave a nod to them as a sign of " I get their points". I went back to college and dropped by a workshop to settle the problem.
I afraid of thinking about what may happen tomorrow, what would touch my nerve in the future? God, please make it easy and pleasant for me to go through this practicum.
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